I Just Wish They Knew

I just wish they knew.

That I sometimes go home and worry about them.

That I turn up every day wanting the best for each person and hoping I am enough to help them achieve it.

That I constantly think of things I might have missed, especially when I’m trying to sleep.

That one small thank you can make my day or one small push for more can almost break me.

That I wonder how they can be so rude when I am trying so hard to help.

That I arrive early and always finish late and this is unpaid.

That the last person thinks mammograms will give them cancer and the next wants one every 6 months.

That sometimes I want to call in sick because I just can’t listen to any more problems, but I don’t.

That I studied for 8 years to get to this and I have already specialised. GP is a specialty.

That some days feel like I’ve been pecked by vultures and there is nothing left, but they want more, now.

That the diabetic man who quit soft drink and has now normalised his sugars has made my whole year.

That there is such a thing as a good death and I am so honoured that I can assist with this.

That I remember every patient that has died and I grieve a little bit for each one.

That this job has given me so much but it has also taken a whole lot.